Troll Day

Look at them, troll mother said. Look at my so...

Image via Wikipedia

Today, I would like to take some time to address the visitors whose comments never get published. That’s right. You know I’m talking about you, little trolls. Thanks to this newfangled concept called “moderation” your precious little mutterings are for my eyes only. The good news is that I have saved a select few for my amusement and now I would like to share them with the world.

Disclaimer: The names have been changed to protect the innocent. idiots!

Our first little comment comes from Kooky Rocky in Seattle, Washington USA. In response to my post Do They Get Our Emails?, Kooky writes:
“To answer your question — no.
Well, Kooky. Thank you for your comment. I’m sure that you worked long and hard on that one. Unfortunately, my response to that would have to be, “Yes!”

Our second featured comment comes from Hanky Mooville in Greeley, Colorado USA. By the way little trolls, in case you are wondering how I know where you are . . . you people leave a digital trail that is so loud, it makes Metallica sound like church music. In response to my post Respect The Cove Guardians, Hanky writes:
Dude. Get help. Really.
OK! If you or anyone else would like to lend a hand, please read my posts Cyber Activism and Why Can’t We Be Friends? If you are completely unfamiliar with what we are talking about, Watch ‘The Cove‘ movie.  Thanks, Hanky!

Our next troll comment comes again from Kooky Rocky. In fact, most of the trolls that visit my little blog are regulars. They just keep coming back for more. Days after his previous comment, Kooky comments on the same post, Do They Get Our Emails?
Be my guest. Whatever makes you feel like you’re “doing something”.
Thanks for the encouragment, Kooky!

The next bit of giggerish comes from . . . guess who! Kooky is back to add his two cents on my post Respect The Cove Guardians. Kooky mutters:
Neither were you.
There is nothing shocking going on in Taiji.
If you want to make a case for Elora and others “sacrificing their emotional well being”, then they should go to Iraq.
Or Congo.
If witnessing people prepare meat was in any way traumatic, our species would not have survived.
Please get a hold of yourself and seek professional help.
Gee, Kooky! It looks like you are still suffering from shell shock. Come back when things clear up so that your comment won’t embarass you as much.

The next bit of dribble comes from Binky Bib in Melbourne, Victoria Australia. Respect The Cove Guardians is popular with him, as well. Binky writes:
What a deranged post from someone in dire need of counselling. Get a ‘hit ‘ man ? typical of AR violent hatred and racism. You should have taken your father’s advice and thought before you wrote the above tripe. Get a grip and get a life instead of writing ‘emotive’ sobbing irrational trash. What gives you the right to quote the Dalai Lama. He thinks the SSCS and Watson are a pack of violent barbarians. This whole whale/dolphin debacle is wearing thin. You need some serious therapy dude, seriously.
My response to you Binky . . .
“An authentic attitude of compassion doesn’t change, even faced with another person’s negative behavior.” – Dalai Lama
I love you too, Binky!

Binky wasn’t quite finished. Poor Binky was so riled up, he came back and commented on the same post, Respect The Cove Guardians. Binky stammered:
Who the hell is Laurens De Groot ? who cares if some unknown was ‘pissed’. So where were you ? not there ? no of course not, you sickly conservationists make me very sick. You all have your own agenda and this agenda has buggar all to do with the animals you profess to save !!!!!
Binky, relax. Here is my response . . .
“A calm mind helps our human intelligence to assess the situation realistically.” – Dalai Lama

For this next one, I have decided to leave the name as is. I just feel sorry for the little troll that his parents would give him a full sentence for a name. Throw Watson In Jail. That’s his name. Seriously! His name is “Throw Watson In Jail.” His parents must have has a sick sense of humor. I will just ferer to him as “Jail.” In response to Respect The Cove Guardians, Jail writes:
So you deleted the anti Watson posts ? I’m sure Mr. Watson told you to. You people are a joke.
Well, Jail. I do not know a Mr. Watson. If you are referring to Captain Paul Watson, I must say that I am flattered that you would assume he is hanging out with me moderating my blog. That would be too cool!

This next comment comes from Mich Insane in Seattle, Washington USA. No! Wait a second! Kooky, you almost had me there! Unless you let someone named Mich borrow your computer, I know it’s really you Kooky! HA! This comment is on my post, 日本の人々! People Of Japan!
Please tell me you send these google translations out… this stuff is really priceless.
If your emails are reaching anyone, they’re probably being passed around the office to show what idiots ARAs are.
OMG, Kooky! You are so funny! That’s okay. You see, it really doesn’t matter what you say. In fact, all that really matters is that you are reading my blog. At this rate, you and all your little troll friends will help me bet “Top Blog” status and my site will be featured by WordPress. That means more visibility and more readers, which in turn will win even more people over to our cause. You will actually be able to say that you had a hand in promoting our cause. Doesn’t that just make you feel all tingly inside?

Whatever you do, don’t stop coming back and reading my posts. Don’t stop with the pings and the spam. Every hit to my page counts and you are all doing a wonderful job. Y’all come back real soon! Ya hear?

With eleven of you, I make a dozen. With ninety-nine of you, I make a hundred. But I cannot do it without each and every one of you. You matter! Never give up! For the Dolphins. For the Whales. For the Oceans!

Dalai Lama Letter